#112: Let's start a rebellion together?

An invitation to serve with me

Rebellion…

That’s a word with a ring about it. ‘Revolution’ is dark and bloody to me. But rebellion, that has a shine about it. In there somewhere is hope against oppression. Freedom from tyranny. Underdogs taking on the Empires and winning against all odds. Rebellion talks to me of community and trust and that feeling deep inside your stomach that a path is true and straight and worth it.

A few things ignite rebellion in me. Teen mental health is one of them. According to a report released by Unicefat the end of October 2023 60% of South African teens need help to manage their anxiety. I thought I was smart at school when I got an aggregate that started with a 6. Now our status quo is more than half our precious children can’t cope with how desperate they feel inside their own heads?

They’re linked. Teen mental health and the conversation we’re having about inequality and justice. Two very famous scientists proved it and published the excellent book below. Read the fine print on the left-hand side… Inequality hurts humans bad. Hardwired into our design are chemicals that release happy feelings. Increase conflict, disconnection, and oppression; and those chemicals stop being secreted so we are sad and anxious. And when we feel like that we all turn to things to ease the pain. Evils like food and alcohol, shopping, sex and drugs. This is hard science now.

But we’re here today. Us twenty or thirty fools who take this content seriously. We’re fighters. Rebels. Hopers. We see and aspire to know the truth. To serve. And not be lulled into a reality driven by media that says that the world is ok.

So maybe it is time for our little community to consider a mission. Missions are like adventures. They foster connection. Set vision and direction. They are proactive and practical and help us not to fall prey to the useless satisfaction of being a desktop warrior. And sometimes, they even discover eternal treasures…

Today I want to invite you to join me on a mission. Here’s why I think it is important for you to consider:

I’ve got a toddler. He’s wide and strong and has hands like a plumber already. The rebel in us has lets his hair grow into a thick, blond mullet that hangs onto his shoulders. It makes him look like he belongs in a cheap pub in Benoni. There’s a certain violence to Sam, but his heart is soft and gentle and sensitive. My wife, she's the smart one in our family. She told me that when my son feels overwhelming emotions and expresses them through a screaming rage, my job as a parent is to get close; hold on tight and help him regulate through his fear by talking. Last night I did that well for the first time. Instead of smacking, or ignoring, or shutting the door I stood with him as he writhed in fear about the dark outside his window. He screamed. I whispered gentle council and within five minutes he was saying sweetly, ‘Baba, I’m not afraid of the dark’.

The point is control is too easy. I have the courage to smack sometimes. To bring order. Make things neat nice and quick. But what really serves a human soul without breaking it is getting into the mess and riding out all those violent, valid feelings through conversation. That is why we have therapists. It’s the process of talking that strangley works to heal our hearts which is something i still can't quite get my head round…And that is why marriage and friendship, pets and community are so important. We can’t change the way we regulate. We have to just submit to our design.

But in the fear of ‘Wokism’ and mess South African schools are opting for safe. Most are taking the easy route. That parenting style that always slams on the TV when things start to get scary so 'their house' remains pretty and ordered for paying customers and governing bodies. If we stick with the analogy of my son, instead of confronting the things that are making 60% of South African teenagers anxious, South African schools are shutting the door and letting kids scream alone in their own heads. It is a bold claim. But I think it is as true as generalisation can be. Transformation committees in schools are being turned into quaint event planners for Nelson Mandela Day and bodies dedicated to serve transformation are being disbanded. 

So it is time to rebel. To hope. To get in the mess and serve.

Here's the plan: Tomfoolery has 10X great courses that are designed for schools to safely have hard conversations that create anxiety. 

Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to go through the slideshow here. Then interrogate two examples of course work here and here. Once that is done it is time to get practical. Assuming you like what you see, our adventure starts by shouldering the responsibility to get this content into just one school each. This is the hard part. Empathy is easy for some. But action, that takes a deliberate decision to rebel and only you can find the genuine motivation to do that with a fire which is real. 

Some helpful data. Firstly, there is no cost to the school if they don’t want to pay. The courses are in a NGO and so if they want to schools can use them for free although we do ask them to donate to the NGO to make the work sustainable and honor those who invested their time. Secondly, I curated them. And if you have read these pieces for a while you know my agenda now. I am awake to pain and the opportunity to serve, not wok. Finally, I think the most beautiful part of this work is students get to tell their own stories for marks using their cellphone. How cool!

I know we all have a lot to deal with. Kids. Church. Commitments. NGO’s we serve and schools we work in to the bone. But 60% of kids suffering so badly that 20% of South Africa teens want to take their lives is a crisis worth investing in I think?

So here’s what I am going to do and I encourage you to join me -

1. I am going to phone my friend who is the deputy head of Pietermartizburg College

2. I am going to tell him that I am serving an NGO and ask for a meeting

3. I am going to meet with him and share this course work and others

4. I am going to ask him to set up another meeting with staff to see how we can include course work in their 2024 calendar

5. Then I am going to phone him each month till the end of March 2024

Total investment - 10 minutes for the first call + 30 minutes for first meet + 30 minutes for second meet + 5 minutes for six months of calling = 2 hours of service tops, which I know is ALOT. Benefit? If I succeed or you succeed in doing the above and the courses get into a single school up a 1,000 kids could have a safe conversation about something that is making them scared and who knows, in their videos they might just say some important things that really serve others like the beautiful humans below:

So with all humility and fragileness I am asking you to join me. Let’s rebel together against apathy of others pain? 

PS: Rebel with me. It will be fun

PSS: Don't rebel with me for me. That will be horrible and taxing

PSSS: Get others to rebel with you? Share this mail with peeps who will find this both fun and meaningful and let's do this in community

PSSSS: Share your progress in the comments. Nothing fuels a rebellion like success 

PSSSSS: While driving to the airport this morning I found myself thinking about the mess of the 2024 elections and my choice to bleed alongside the DA. All the angst was gone. What remains is a peaceful smile and joy of remembering worthwhile work that was hard but lakka